Thank you, Thank you, sniff, Thank you. This is the happiest day of my life! I am so proud to represent the people of potato country, the land of my father and my fathers father and my fathers mother and my fathers mothers father and my, well you get the idea...Yesterday, I recieved the surprising news that I once held the title of Miss Idaho. The nice lady responsible for this lovely rumor has kindly spread the news over a number of years to hundreds of people- enough it sounds like that I may be truly famous one day. To think this could have continued to be my legacy for years to come- had I not been in a conversation with someone else while she was nearby and she overheard me telling them I was from Utah. "Utah?!" she says "how can you be from Utah- I thought you were miss Idaho!" Giddy with delight, I halfheartedly exclaim (as my head begins to grow) "Oh no, not me, I'm from Utah, but my dad's from Idaho. Where did you get the idea I was Miss Idaho? Goodness me (blushing, come on keep those compliments coming), I don't know where you would ever get such an idea!" She replies that she's been telling people that for all these years. (She has known me for 15 or so).
So anyway, I just felt I had an obligation to set the record staight, in case the news has drifted out to any of you (you know, the possibility this has made me famous all this time unbeknownst to me). I choose to live with integrity and do not want the world to think I am something I am not. Potatoes should never be represented by an imposter, so though I love potatoes dearly, I leave them to their true representatives, all the real Miss Idaho's, those past and future, who truly deserve this title. My final note would be to thank any of you who actually believed this or would have believed it had you heard it. Thank you for believing in me. I would feel even better if you would have believed I could have been Miss Texas or Miss California- not that I think Miss Idaho any less of a beauty queen, it's just that, you know, all those ones who became Miss America, well there are lots of Texas's and California's in there, you know...